Categories
Ramadan

Kissing in Ramadan: Kissing Your Spouse While Fasting In Ramadan

Question:

Dear scholars, as-salamu `alaykum. Can a husband and wife kiss during the fast? Jazakum Allah khayran

In short:

Kissing, huggin, embracing, touching and repeatedly looking at one’s wife or concubine is permisible in Ramadan only if the man or the couple is able to control themselves. This is because it is reported in a hadith that the Prophet used to kiss and embrace his wives whilst he was fasting but he was the most in control of his desire.

For more details about Kissing and fasting in Ramadan, let’s read below.

Read Also: Ramadan rules: Etiquette of fasting in Ramadan

Answers by Sheikh Sayyed Sabiq and Sheikh Ahmad Kutty Wa`alaykum.

As-salamu wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh. In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful. All praise and thanks are due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger.

Kissing one’s wife while fasting in Ramadan isn’t bad, it’s permissible. However, it is better and therefore recommended to avoid kissing during the daytime of Ramadan, as it may lead to further actions for which you may regret (which may nullify your fast), such as sexual intercourse.

In his well-known book, Fiqh As-Sunnah, Sheikh Sayyed Sabiq states: It is confirmed that `A’ishah said:

“The Prophet would kiss and embrace while he was fasting, for he had the most control of all of you over his desires.”

`Umar said: I was excited one time and I kissed [my wife] while I was fasting. I went to the Prophet and said:

“Today I committed a horrendous act—I kissed while I was fasting.”

The Prophet asked:

“What do you think of rinsing your mouth with water while fasting?”

I said:

“There is nothing wrong with that.”

The Prophet said:

‘Then, why do you question about it!’

Ibn al-Mundhir says:

“`Umar, Ibn `Abbas, Abu Hurairah, `A’ishah, `Ata, al-Sha`bi, al-Hassan, Ahmad, and Ishaq permit kissing.

The Hanafi and Shafi`i scholars say that it is disliked if it incites one’s desires. If it does not do so, it is not disliked although it is better to avoid it.’

There is no difference between an old man and a young man in this matter. The question is whether or not the kiss excites one’s desires. If it does, it is disliked. If it does not, it is not disliked although it is best to avoid it.

It does not matter if the kiss was on the cheek or on the lips, and so on. Touching with the hand or embracing follow the same ruling as kissing.”

Elaborating on the issue, Sheikh Ahmad Kutty, a senior lecturer and Islamic scholar at the Islamic Institute of Toronto, Ontario, Canada, states:

In optional fasts, kissing, light touching, etc. are permitted so long as one does not engage in sexual intercourse. In obligatory fasts, one is allowed to do these only if one can control himself or herself. Breaking an obligatory fast through sexual intercourse is a serious offense, and it entails a strict form of kaffarah (expiation), which includes fasting two months consecutively; if one cannot do this, one must feed sixty poor persons for a single day of fast thus invalidated. Therefore, no one who is fasting should do such things if there is a genuine risk of overstepping the boundaries. If there is no such fear then light touching, or kissing, etc., when not accompanied by sexual desire, is permissible.

When the Prophet (peace be upon him) was asked by a young man whether he can kiss his wife while fasting, he replied no, but when an elderly person came and asked him the same question, he replied yes.

Kissing in Ramadan old couple

Reasons for this are clear: While it may be easier for an elderly person to control himself, that may not be the case with regard to a young person.

As far as the Prophet’s own example is concerned, his beloved wife ‘A’ishah reported that he used to kiss his wife while he was fasting. But then she added the following comment: ‘Who among you can control his sexual desire as the Prophet himself was able to do?’

In conclusion, since each person knows his own weaknesses better than anyone else, he should be his own judge in this matter and he is better advised to take necessary precautions when dealing with obligatory fasts.

In case of optional fasts, however, because it does not entail any serious consequences if one were to break it because of uncontrollable sexual desire, the issue is far more flexible.

Allah Almighty knows best. Excerpted, with slight modifications, from www.muslims.ca

Categories
Ramadan

Cooking food for my husband who isn’t fasting during Ramadan?

Dear scholars, as-salamu `alaykum. My questions are these: Is it my duty to cook and serve food for my husband during Ramadan when he doesn’t fast during the day? He takes medication that is not prescribed by the doctor, and I am sure he does not need to take it three times a day. He doesn’t even pray. I am not happy about the situation, and my repeated efforts to make him understand that he must pray does not yield any results. He says it’s not haram not to pray. He uses this non-prescribed medication as an excuse not to fast. He doesn’t make up for it in other ways, though he knows they exist.

Jazakum Allah khayran.

Wa`alaykum as-salamu wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh. In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful, All praise and thanks are due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger.

Fasting during the month of Ramadan is one of the five pillars of Islam which is obligatory upon every Muslim, male or female, who is adult (i.e. has reached puberty) and sane and who is not sick or on a journey. The Qur’an says:

The month of Ramadan in which was revealed the Qur’an, a guidance for mankind and clear proofs for the guidance and the criterion (between right and wrong). So whoever of you sights (the crescent on the first night of) the month (of Ramadan, i.e., is present at his home), he must observe Sawm (fasting) that month, and whoever is ill or on a journey, the same number (of days which one did not observe Sawm (fasting) must be made up) from other days. Allah intends for you ease, and He does not want to make things difficult for you. (He wants that you) must complete the same number (of days), and that you must magnify Allah (i.e., to say Takbir (Allahu Akbar: Allah is the Most Great)) for having guided you so that you may be grateful to Him (Al-baqarah 2:185)

You do not owe the duty of cooking for or serving food and drink to your husband who does not fast during the days of Ramadan, if he does so without having any valid reason of sickness, travel, or old age that would exempt him from fasting. Since we are not allowed to condone or aid and abet someone who is doing a sin, if you do serve food or drink to him (during the hours of fast), your actions are considered sinful.

It is common knowledge in Islam that skipping fasts without valid reason of sickness, travel or old age, etc. is considered a major sin. From the way you have described your husband, it does not seem that he has any valid excuses not to fast.

Your husband is guilty of another major offence by not praying; even greater than all of these is his denial of his obligation to pray while still considering himself to be a Muslim. If a Muslim denies his obligation to pray or fast, etc., he automatically goes out of the fold of Islam by such denial. There is a general consensus of scholars in Islam on this issue.

Allah Almighty knows best.

Categories
Ramadan Zakaat

Should a Muslim Pay Zakat Al-Fitr for His Christian or Jewish Wife or a Non-Muslim?

Question:

Dear scholars, as-salamu `alaykum.

If a Muslim man is married to a Christian woman and they have children, should he pay Zakat Al-Fitr for her? Jazakum Allah khayran.

Wa `alaykum as-salamu wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh. In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful. All praise and thanks are due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger.

A Muslim husband does not need to pay Zakat Al-Fitr on behalf of his non-Muslim wife, according to the majority of Muslim scholars, whereas on the other hand, Abu Hanifah and his followers see that a man in this case is obliged to pay Zakat Al-Fitr on behalf on his non-Muslim wife.

Regarding this question, Sheikh `Atiyyah Saqr, former head of Al-Azhar Fatwa Committee, states the following:

Zakat Al-Fitr is to be paid by the head of the household for himself and for those he is obliged to maintain, i.e. his family members including his wife. Although all Muslim scholars agree that a man is obliged to sustain his non-Muslim wife, they differ concerning paying Zakat Al-Fitr for her.

The majority of scholars including Malik, Ash-Shafi`e and Ahmad maintain that a man is not obliged to pay Zakat Al-Fitr for his non-Muslim wife, because she is not herself required to pay it because she is outside the boundaries of Islam. They base their opinion on the view suggesting that a non-Muslim is not charged for the branches of Shari`ah.

It is, moreover, reported that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) prescribed Zakat Al-Fitr on all Muslims, free and enslaved; male and female; young and old.

Also, Zakat Al-Fitr is considered a way to purify the fasting person from lewdness and abuse, as reported by Abu Dawud with a sound chain of transmitters, on the authority of Ibn `Abbas (may Allah be pleased with them both). Hence, it is meaningless to demand non-Muslims to pay Zakat Al-Fitr, as they are not required to observe fasting like Muslims.

The fore-mentioned hadith restricts prescribing Zakat Al-Fitr to Muslims. In the hadith, the word ‘Muslims’ refers to the persons on whose behalf Zakah is paid, not the person who pays it. Therefore, it is not necessary for a man to pay Zakat Al-Fitr on behalf of his non-Muslim slave even though he is obliged to maintain him. The same ruling applies to a non-Muslim wife. (Ibn Qudamah; Al-Mughni; vol. 2, pp. 646-647)

Abu Hanifah and other scholars of Ashab Ar-Ra’i maintain that a Muslim has to pay Zakat Al-Fitr on behalf of his young son who apostatizes from Islam, because one is not accounted for apostasy unless he fulfills the conditions of legal accountability including adulthood.

They also maintain that a man should pay Zakat Al-Fitr on behalf of his Christian or Jewish slave. They base their view on the fact that a father is obliged to maintain his young son and a master is obliged to maintain his slave. They cite a hadith from the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) in which he says:

“Pay half a Sa` of barley (one Sa`= 2.176 kilograms) on behalf of everyone, free or slave; young or old; Jew, Christian or pagan.”

However, the majority of scholars have refuted this hadith saying that it is not reported in the well-known books of tradition.

Some argue that Zakat Al-Fitr purifies the fasting person from committing any lewdness or abuse, and is, thus, not paid on behalf of non-Muslim family members due to the fact that they do not fast. However, it is paid in favor of the needy on behalf of those who are excused from fasting. Hence, a non-Muslim wife or slave is in the same position as the excused.

This claim is also refuted by the fact that if a Muslim does not observe fasting in Ramadan without a valid excuse, he will be charged with two things; to make up fasting and to pay Zakah. Neither of the two replaces the other.

Allah Almighty knows best.

Categories
Ramadan

Taking Medication (Birth Control Pills) in the Daytime of Ramadan

Question:

I am an unmarried female with some medical condition for which my doctors have ordered me to be on birth control pills. I have been taking them for the past 3 months and their timing is very strict; in other words, I have to take them at the exact time every day! I have been taking them at 4 p.m. and with Ramadan starting I do not know what to do. Please advise!

In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful. All praise and thanks are due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger.

Fasting in Ramadan is one of the pillars of Islam. Failing to fast during the blessed month with no valid reason is a serious sin that a Muslim must avoid. So, you are advised to discuss with your doctor possible ways to safely delay the pills time until after breaking the fast (iftar).

In his response to your question, Sheikh Ahmad Kutty, a senior lecturer and Islamic scholar at the Islamic Institute of Toronto, Ontario, Canada, states the following:

It is my understanding that the timings for the pills are not inflexible, as people have a tendency to forget or skip a day altogether.

Nevertheless, speak to your doctor or pharmacist about delaying the timing of taking the pill and continuing on a post- iftar or pre- sahur schedule until the end of Ramadan [that is, after breaking the fast at sunset or before dawn].

It is important for us to remember that fasting of Ramadan is a fundamental religious obligation that we ought to observe unless we have genuine reasons to skip it. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said,

“Whoever breaks a single day of Ramadan fast without valid reason will not be able to make up for the same by fasting for a lifetime” (Ahmad and An-Nasa’i)

May Allah grant us steadfastness in obedience to Him and may He accept our fasts, prayers, and good works. Ameen.

Allah Almighty knows best.

Categories
Ramadan Relationships and Marriage

Can a couple have Sexual Intercourse while Observing Optional Fast?

Question:

As-salamu `alaykum. If someone fasted Sunnah and had sexual intercourse with his spouse at the daytime, is he obliged to make kaffarah or is there any expiation for that? Thank you.

Answer by Dr. Wael Shihab

Wa `alaykum as-salamu wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh.

In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful. All praise and thanks are due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger.

A Muslim is highly recommended to observe optional fasts to draw himself closer to Allah. If a fasting person breaks his optional fast, he is neither required to pay an expiation nor to make up for it later. It makes no difference here how he breaks his optional fast.

Responding to your question, Dr. Wael Shihab, PhD in Islamic Studies, Al-Azhar University, and the Head of the Shari`ah Dept. of Onislam.net website, stated,

Thank you for your question.

A Muslim is recommended to fast on some days— such as Mondays, Thursdays, the day of `Arafah, etc.—in order to bring himself closer to Allah Almighty.

If a Muslim breaks an optional fast—with food, drinks, or sexual intercourse with one’s spouse—he is not liable to make any kaffarah (expiation). Also, he is not required to make up for it later.

In this context, the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said, “A person who observes an optional fast has the authority to either complete or break his fast.” (At-Tirmidhi)

However, it may be better for a fasting person not to break his optional fast to gain its great rewards.

May Allah accept your and our good deeds!

Allah Almighty knows best.

 

Categories
Ramadan Relationships and Marriage

Can Husband and Wife Sleep on One Bed While Fasting in Ramadan?

Question:

Dear scholars,  as-salamu `alaykum.

Is a fasting wife allowed to sleep next to her fasting husband without the intention of sexual intercourse? Jazakum Allah khayran.

Answer by Sheikh Ahmad Kutty

Wa`alaykum as-salamu wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh. In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful. All praise and thanks are due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger.

There is nothing wrong for husband and wife to share a bed while both of them are fasting if they have no fear of being carried away by their desires to invalidate their fast.

In his response to your question, Sheikh Ahmad Kutty states:

There is nothing wrong for you to share the bed with your wife while both of you are fasting unless, of course, you fear that by doing so you will find yourself unable to control your desires and thus be led to invalidate your fast by engaging in sexual intercourse, in which case you are best advised against it.

We read in the traditions that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) was once asked by a man whether he could kiss his wife while fasting, to which he replied, no, but when another man asked him the same question he told him, yes. Explaining the reason for the divergent responses, Ibn `Abbas, one of the eminent Companions of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said:

“The first was a young man (and the Prophet presumed that he would be carried away by his desires and thus may end up invalidating his fast by engaging in sexual intercourse), while the second was an elderly person (who he thought was in a better position to restrain himself).”

Similarly, we also read the statement of `A’ishah, the beloved wife of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him), that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) use to kiss his wife while fasting, but she further added, “But who among you is able to restrain his desire as the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) was wont to?”

Based on the above considerations, if you are sure of yourself and have no fear of being carried away by your desires to invalidate your fast, then you are definitely allowed to sleep in the same bed with your wife while fasting.

Allah Almighty knows best.

Categories
Ramadan Relationships and Marriage

Having Premarital Relationship during Ramadan

Question:

Respected scholars, as-salamu `alaykum.

Is it ok to make love with my boyfriend during Ramadan; that is after we break the fast? Jazakum Allahu khayran.

Answer by Sheikh Ahmad Kutty

Wa `alaykum as-salam wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh.

In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.

All praise and thanks are due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger.

It should be stressed that having a premarital relationship is definitely prohibited whether during Ramadan or after it. So, it is our advice, dear sister, to fear Allah, come back to Him, make use of this blessed month to change your lifestyle for better in a way that pleases Allah, and to have your sins forgiven.

In his response to your question, Sheikh Ahmad Kutty, a senior lecturer and Islamic scholar at the Islamic Institute of Toronto, Ontario, Canada, states,

If you mean to ask whether you are allowed to have premarital sexual relations, the answer is definitely an emphatic no, regardless of whether one is fasting or after breaking the fast. Fornication is a most grievous sin in Islam; the sin is even graver in the month of Ramadan.

Ramadan is the month given to us to break free of all our sins and bad habits. Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) said:

“When Ramadan arrives, the doors of Heaven are opened and the doors of Hell are shut down, and the devils are chained, and an announcer will say, ‘O doer of good, come forward! O doer of bad, restrain yourself!'”

So you are best advised to use this blessed month as a time to repent and change. This is a golden opportunity, and it could be the only one you have, for who knows whether Allah will give us another chance; we never know whether we will live to see another Ramadan. We see all around us people are being called back to Allah. Death knows neither age nor status. Therefore, let us heed the warning of Allah’s Messenger:

“Woe to those who witnessed Ramadan and yet failed to get their sins pardoned (by failing to utilize the month properly).”

If, however, you are married, then of course you are allowed to have intimate spousal relations after breaking the fast. Allah says,

“It is lawful for you to go in unto your wives during the night preceding the (day’s) fast: They are as a garment for you, and you are as a garment for them} (Al-Baqarah 2:187).

Allah Almighty knows best.

 

Categories
Ramadan

Hugging One’s Spouse While Fasting in Ramadan

As-Salamu `alaykum. Are a husband and wife allowed to hug while fasting?

Jazakum Allah khayran. Answer by Sheikh Ahmad Kutty

Wa’alaykum salaam warahmatullahi wa barakatuh. All praise and thanks are due to Allah alone, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger pbuh.

In obligatory fasts (Ramadan), one is allowed to do these only if one can control oneself. Therefore, no one who is fasting should do such things if there is a genuine risk of overstepping the boundaries. If there is no such fear, then light touching, or kissing, etc, when not accompanied by sexual desire, is permissible.

In his response to your question, Sheikh Ahmad Kutty, a senior lecturer and Islamic scholar at the Islamic Institute of Toronto, Ontario, Canada, states, Hugging your spouse in itself does not invalidate the fast; we read in the sources that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) used to kiss his wife while fasting.

We also read that once a person asked the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) “Am I allowed to kiss my wife while fasting?” He replied, “Yes.” Hugging is comparable to kissing.

Having said this, however, I must caution you to abstain from such acts if you find yourself unable to control your desire, for as Muslims we must keep away from all such acts that may inadvertently lead to invalidating our fasts.

This is why we read in another hadith that the Prophet told another person not to kiss his spouse. In explaining the discrepancy between the two reports, Ibn `Abbas said, “The man he permitted was an older person, while the man he prohibited was a young man.”

Thus, if you have any doubt or fear of being unable to control yourself, then you should simply abstain from such actions altogether in order to save your fast. This is why the Prophet’s wife `A’ishah (may Allah be pleased with her) asked a person, ‘Who among you is capable of restraining himself as the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) had been?’

Allah Almighty knows best

hugging and kissing in Ramadan